What's in A Name? (Part 2 - B)

ETO NA, WISH KO LANG WORTH THE WAIT ITETCH :P


His effort fell short.

The time he reached the restaurant, she was gone, long gone.

The night when they were supposed to celebrate their third anniversary, turned out to be the night that he broke another promise, the night he broke her heart yet again. The good man that he was, told him to just let her go... to a better place, to a better man; but the man that he is, the selfish and unfair man that he had become decided on holding on, on chasing after her, on promising anew.

And he did, erase that, he tried.

She had gotten wiser after dealing with him, with their relationship for the past three years, because the minute he spewed lengthy and flowery promises, she begun to make a demand of her own. A demand he can readily give now but he was stupid then, he made the wrong choice, he said the wrong words, he messed up. He thought it was a demand so unreasonable, she wasn't serious; he thought he can work his way out and about it, without her taking a notice; he thought it was just one of those demands that a girlfriend would make to have her petty revenge; he thought it was just a means to shake him, to ponder on his mistakes and do better.

But he thought wrong, it was an ultimatum.

It was a part of a tactical game that he didn't realized they were playing, it was one of those crucial moves and he miscalculated, and so he lose. And just like those cliche love stories, theirs ended, with the lead girl leaving her arse of a boyfriend behind, because he lacked the mental capacity to understand her and physiological ability to be in a relationship.

She turned her back and walked away, leaving him heartbroken... empty.



"The usual," he told the bartender.

He is a regular at the club, he usually comes with friends, but that night, those who belong in the entertainment world like him were busy working on their schedules, while those who work with regular jobs weren't thrilled with the idea of getting drunk on a weekday. 'It doesn't matter though, it's not like I still recognize them when I'm wasted,' he smirked inwardly.

He came straight from a photo shoot, he was tired as hell, but he needed his daily dose of liquor to lull him to sleep; if he don't, he'll just end up lying in bed restless, thinking about and missing her.

The bartender smiled and passed him his drink, "Where's the rest?" he inquired.

"Oh, some are busy, most are just sissy," he grinned at his own reply.

"Hye Jung-ah!"

The grin was wiped off his face, he was frozen on his seat.

But in that instant, he felt his heart beating, pumping blood through his veins, his heart heard her name and it functioned back to life.

The past couple of months, he has been living like the walking sculpture that he was dubbed as, without guilt, without pain, without hope, he didn't know when exactly he became numb to it all but all that was left of him was emptiness; he felt restlessness once in a while, when he's sober enough to actually feel a sense of loss, of missing her, but more than that, he was just a shell of what Kim Hyun Joong used to be.

She took it all away with her.

"Hye Jung-ah," the woman who was seated a few seats away from him called, again, while waving her hands up.

He looked at her, an unfamiliar face but he still followed her line of vision, albeit slowly, hoping against hope, that it was the same Hye Jung that he long to see, the one woman his heart beats for.

But he was bound to be disappointed, the lady sashaying her way closer to them was no way near the person she shared a name with. 'I should file a patent on her name, a label only she can have,' he thought, sighing.

His frustration prompt him to drink more than he planned to, "Hye Jung-ah," he breathed. The name brought a smile on his face.

"Hye Jung-ah," he whispered, a little louder, more audible.

"Hye Jung-ah," he huffed, it was loud enough for the few people beside him to hear.

"Hye Jung-ah," he called.

The woman who was lucky enough to be born with her name, came closer and seductively asked, "You call?"

He lifted a fraction of his head to look at her, he drowsily inquired, "Hyeee Juuung-aaah?"

"Yes," she replied, her excitement evident.

"Hye Jung-ah," he smiled, her name a sweet ambrosia to his alcohol bittered-mouth. He stood up, draped an arm around the girl's waist and walked out through the backdoor where his car and driver was waiting.



And that was what started it all, his playing with fire, his playing with her namesakes.

The first wasn't intentional, he even blamed it on alcohol; the second, partly was, he blamed it on being sober enough to had missed her to madness; the third, he wasn't entirely sure anymore; the fourth, fifth, sixth, up to his recent conquest, he had forgotten how to care.

He lost the conscience to give a damn, he forego the need to find a justification on what he was doing. Because every once in a while, he wants to feel his heartbeat, every once in a while, he wants to feel alive... and only she can make him feel that.

For every time he hears her name, his heart comes to life; for every time he says her name, he is awaken from a long and lifeless sleep; and for every time someone answers to his call, it feels like everything has fallen to its proper place, it feels like everything is finally okay. Only her name can give him the pleasure and the privilege of being whole. Only her.

He isn't proud of what he had become, but it was a means to survival. Humans were created with the instinct to survive, and he's just one.

He was actually doing good.

Until he heard the news.


*** Part 1 is here, Part 2 - A is here, in case you missed it :)


*** Chocolates, chocolates, chocolates... hahaha! You want part 3, it's in my folder, I'll post it after I receive my chocolates and caramels, weeee! CHOZ LANG!